At this point I want to give you a brief summary of the past few months so that we can all be caught up with where everything is currently. I am not sure how many of you have read my previous blog, ( http://faithloveandbabydust.weebly.com/ )especially the birth story, but I'd have to honestly say that the birth of baby Emily (surrogate baby #1) was one of the most meaningful moments of my life. Obviously the birth of my own kids was simply amazing but this was an experience unlike any other. I had carried this sweet baby girl inside of me for 9 months, plus months of work to get pregnant before that, and it all culminated in her delivery in March of 2018. To go from carrying this other family's baby in my belly to seeing her held and loved by her two dad's was truly a special moment, I literally watched her family grow right before my eyes. She is such a sweet and happy baby and I am just so happy that her Dad's and I still continue to have a great relationship where they share pictures of her at special moments in her life and where our families still see each other on occasion. For those of you who wonder how my kid's reacted to surrogacy I can honestly tell you that to them it is part of normal every day life. I don't think they realize that it's not really "normal" for everyone. They of course love seeing Emily but it's just like the love they have for close friends or cousins, not anything more just because I carried her. Not every surrogate has this relationship with intended parents but it is how ours has developed which I am very happy about.
I can remember immediately after delivering Emily telling my doctor that I wanted to do this again. She had thought I meant deliver a baby naturally without pain meds again (which yes I want to do) but really I meant to be a surrogate again and to help another beautiful family grow. I knew that I needed to wait 9-12 months before transfer so around 5-6 months after Emily I started the match process again, of course with the same wonderful agency I had used before. Honestly, this agency had been so wonderful to me that I could not imagine using anyone else. I had a "perfect" match and of course loved my case manager and everyone else that I had worked with throughout the entire process, they truly do put their hearts into their work! I actually loved the agency so much that during my pregnancy with Emily I told my case manager that if they ever had an opening for a case manager to please consider me! I honestly did not at all expect that a few months after having Emily I was told that there was an opening and that I should apply, skip ahead a few weeks and I was offered a job as a case manager! This was such an exciting opportunity for me so of course I could not say no. Yes it's a little hard to believe that I would give up a career as a nurse (with 10+ years of experience) but sometimes you have to follow your heart and do what you know is right for you and your family. I have worked here for 6 months and honestly have no regrets at all. I truly love what I do and not only do I have amazing coworkers (trust me I ask them like 10 million questions a day and they always answer) but I also work with an awesome group of intended parents, surrogates and of course clinics. I have a quote up in my office which really holds true:
"Working hard for something we don't care about is called STRESS... Working hard for something we love is called PASSION!"
Now back to my journey as a repeat gestational carrier! I want to first clarify that although I work for the agency that I am using as a surrogate, I have first hand knowledge of privacy laws from being a registered nurse and everything involved in my journey is kept private. I think nursing really does train you to keep work separate and to know how to maintain boundaries. Luckily I was matched with two awesome intended parents that are completely understanding and happy with how everything has worked out!
I don't want to share too much about my intended parents so that they can maintain privacy but they are a same sex couple that live relatively local to me and they are two of the sweetest people that I have ever met! Once again the amazing matching team at my agency made a perfect match and I truly could not be any happier!
After matching in September we proceeded along the typical timeline of a match which started with Psychological and then Medical Screening with CCRM-VA. I had always worked with SGF in the past but I said that I would be open to work with other clinics, ideally a local clinic which this was is. Psych screening was the first time that I met the guys in person and they were just as sweet in person as they were over email and video chat. We all passed with flying colors and our first embryo transfer was scheduled for 1/8/19! This was of course a very exciting time, the guys met our kids the weekend before transfer and they designed transfer shirts that I then made! I also made cookies for the IVF center, yes sperm and eggs, haha! CCRM also made us this really sweet card to memorialize the day... needless to say we all REALLY wanted this to work!
The day of transfer went really well! We met the the guys at CCRM-VA, Jeremy went too, and then after transfer we all went to lunch before Jeremy went home and I went to a hotel to rest before going home the next day. I think I went into that transfer a little naive, assuming it would work just like the first one had with my last journey. Unfortunately 9 days after transfer, on 1/17, we had blood drawn and it was negative. This is not the fun part of any journey but unfortunately IVF is not 100% and this happens.
I did go through an endometrial biopsy and some autoimmune testing after the first failed transfer, but luckily after everything checked out normal we have a second transfer scheduled for 3/5/19. I had my baseline lining check today (I will now start estrogen and baby aspirin), and then the second one will be on 2/21, and the third check will be 2/28. If all is clear on 2/28 I will start progesterone injections and we will have the transfer on 3/5! I think we are all going into this transfer optimistic, these embryos were all genetically tested, and although we had a first failed transfer, we are all hopeful that the "second time's a charm"!
Here is an updated picture of my beautiful family <3 Who continues to be awesome and supportive with all of my adventures! This was taken by the talented Liz Hough with Liz Hough Photography <3
